So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize