is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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