Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
