You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
