Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
