Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
