I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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