yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
