U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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