she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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