I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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