I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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