She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
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