Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
