you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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