Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
