lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
she woke up with a sticky ear
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
