Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
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