Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
