That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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