Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
