I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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