what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
My vagina is very pro this idea
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
