I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
