can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
