My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
