You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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