I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize