You really coming over, don't trick.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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