i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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