Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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