I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
