I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
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I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
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I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm