i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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