maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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