i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Let's get the cat blown out
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Randomize
