omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
