Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
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