one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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