This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
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