Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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