physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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