Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.

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(909): View more from California

I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.

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(561): View more from Florida

new revelation: five guys for breakfast

(561): View more from Florida

new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation

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(860): View more from Connecticut

So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(480): View more from Arizona

She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...

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(313): View more from Michigan

At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?

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(406): View more from Montana

Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.

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(561): View more from Florida

Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.

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(541): View more from Oregon

COCAINE IS GR8

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