Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
