Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
This girl is more easily done than said...
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
