So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
