It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
