do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
