It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
