I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize