eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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